Traditional Duties for Wedding Party and Family

BM Dresses - Autumn Light PhotographyWe hear from couples, wedding party and even family asking, what are we supposed to do?  So, here are some traditional roles/duties for some key players in the wedding to help out the couple in preparation for their big day:

Maid/Matron of Honor

  • helps the bride select the bridesmaid’s attire and the bride’s dress
  • helps communicate details to the bridesmaids and works with them to coordinate any bridal showers or bachelorette party, as well as coordinate bridesmaids’ gift to the bride (if given)
  • helps address save the dates, invitations and write escort or place cards as needed
  • keeps record of gifts given at showers and parties

Best Man

  • organizes the bachelor party
  • helps communicate details to the groomsmen, including helping them with their attire, and coordinates groommens’ gift to the groom (if given)


  • offer to help with pre-wedding tasks as needed
  • help scout out bridesmaid attire and pay for entire ensemble (unless bride’s family offers)
  • help plan and pay for bridal shower and bachelorette party


  • attend all pre-wedding festivities
  • pay for wedding day attire (making sure to order in a timely fashion)
  • help the Best Man plan the bachelor party

Mother of the Bride

  • be a sounding board
  • help the bride select ceremony and reception sites
  • help the bride choose her wedding dress
  • be a pre-wedding ambassador sharing information on showers and where the couple is registered
  • share local knowledge and be welcoming to the groom’s parents
  • compile names and addresses of your family and friends to be included in the master guest list
  • talk to the grooms family about who they want to add to the guest list
  • help research family or ethnic traditions to incorporate into the ceremony
  • determine what the bride wants you to wear on the big day, and coordinate with the mother of the groom
  • attend the bridal shower

Mother of the Groom

  • when the engagement is announced, call the bride’s parents as soon as possible and express your excitement
  • host a dinner to introduce the bride to the groom’s family if necessary
  • be aware of expenses typically covered by the groom’s side and offer financial assistance to the groom if appropriate
  • choose your dress, try to coordinate with the brides mother
  • get to know your son’s fiancée
  • prepare your guest list
  • offer to help scout out ceremony and reception locations, or offer recommendations for florist, caterers, and other vendors
  • attend bridal shower and buy a gift
  • spread the word to your side of the family on where the couple is registered
  • keep track of your lists RSVP’s and offer to make last minute calls for responses on your side of the family
  • plan and host the rehearsal dinner

We hope this helps clarify some of the roles!  Next up, we’ll review duties for the wedding day.

photo provided by Autumn Light Photography

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